Today I began the work, the journey of repairing a stained glass piece for someone. They had reached out yesterday to ask about the repair. I sent pics to my teacher, mentor, who said it's repairable an suggested I do it.
GULP!
The only repair I have attempted so far is on one of my pieces. I have begun it, but haven't finished.
I found some glass that I thought matched in my collection.
Today I picked up the piece and headed to the glass shop.
I started the repair.
First things first-- remove the sections of glass that are cracked.
Deconstruction time.
I scored the glass some with a cutter, then used a small hammer to crack the glass. I used pliers to get the pieces out.
I will admit that breaking the glass and getting it out was fun.
Deconstruction is a healthy process. It clears out that which no longer works, is broken, or is in need of repair.
Oh, the piece I am working on is a cross. (see 1st pic above)
It is not lost on me that deconstructing this cross can be compared to faith deconstruction. When we realize ways of thinking or practicing our faith no longer work, are broken, or are indeed of repair, we try new practices. I have heard the expression: 'the practices that got you here won't work going forward '. I have found that to be true. Ways of praying lost their meaning. Time with the Creator and study changed. Instead of studying for information, I began to study for transformation. I began to look deeper into practices of lectio divina, silence, solitude, centering prayer, contemplative photography, etc. I didn't throw out the baby with the bathwater. I discerned what was still useful for me. It has been a process, a journey.
As I am working on the repair for the cross, I see the parallel. I am removing the pieces that no longer work. I am not removing everything. As I removed glass today, there was a feeling of accomplishment, that I was doing something to improve the piece, to make it stronger.
I am not where done with the repair. I just started it today.
I see how deconstruction is necessary and then how reconstruction follows.
Instead of being stuck in a broken state, the cross will be new. Yet, it is still the cross it was. Only, it will be without holes and major cracks. It will be more whole.
Again, I see how that process has worked with my faith.
Currently, the cross is now in a state of disrepair, deconstruction. Looking at it, one might wonder how thisstep was necessary or helpful. But i ha to remove what was broken in order to create space for the new pieces.
I will keep you posted on my first repair piece.
I might continue to share how my faith journey has changed, how it has grown deeper, how new practices have made me more whole.
Peace on the Lenten journey that continues this Holy Week.
Rev. Deb
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