My year of jubilee.... it's finally here!!! Now what?!?!

I have been waiting this whole past year for this moment.  Seriously! I have anticipated turning 50 with excitement so much that you would think last year was my year of jubilee.  It was definitely my preparatory year.

I had the nudge on October 1 to start walking, so I did.  And I walked over 500 miles this past year.

For whatever reason, the nudge to hang glide for year 49 was strong, so I went for it.  That was one of the most incredible experiences ever.

I also experienced some significant difficult times in my life with the declining health and death of my grandmother.  I still have yet to blog about that, but I did post a few things here and there in blog posts and on facebook.  One day, when I'm ready, I will honor the rumblings in my soul and write about those times.  Meanwhile, it was an incredible journey to spend time with her weekly last year and to be with her at the end.

Taking BioEthics at the end of that journey (this past Spring semester in February) was difficult, especially when you add in the other situations in my life that I rarely write about that deal with mental illness and brain injury situations.  Suffice it to say that I have been blessed with opportunities for hands-on learning and ministry of presence.

This past year also brought along the death of a very special young man, Will.  His life, his hospital time, and his death forever are part of my journey.  What a blessing and privilege to have been able to walk the path with his family, then and now.

My preparatory year for my year of jubilee included many things.  I often contemplated how I would celebrate the big 5-0 when it finally came.   What I decided was that I would live into my year of freedom, my year of jubilee.  I would embrace it.  I would have fun.  I would live into the adventures set before me and seek out some new ones.  I would complete the paths I was currently on.  (Meaning that I graduate during my year of jubilee!! And I follow the path of commissioning as a Provisional Elder in the United Methodist Church.)

My husband and I made plans for a two night get-away in KY at a B&B, Eagle's View B&B located near Burnside.  (I had enough credits through the Kentucky frequent B&B plan to get a free night.)  We viewed Cumberland Falls, hiked the Natural Arch and the Panoramic View trail, checked out some fresh raspberries that were locally grown at the Cedar Creek Vineyards and ate dinner at Guthrie's Riverhouse Restaurant.  It was a great way to end 49 and bring in 50.

Eagle's View B&B

Sunset, October 7th 2014

Cumberland Falls, October 8th 2014

Natural Arch, October 8th 2014

Natural Arch (up close)

Natural Arch (from underneath)

Natural Arch (from inside)

Cedar Creek Vineyards

Jeff Wiles picking raspberries-- they were delicious!

The plan was to pick up our daughter from my parents and take her to Atlanta, GA to the Georgia Aquarium.  My folks, my daughter, my brother, his girlfriend, and my nephew surprised me with a special lunch and a cookie cake!  Balloons and streamers decorated the dining room and entrance way.  After the celebration, we headed to Atlanta for a couple of days.

I went to my first TaeKwonDo workout as a 50 year old yesterday (Tuesday October 14) and found that I can still do the workout.   ☺ Whew!  One of my goals for my year of jubilee is to test for my next belt level, which is a 1st degree, level 3.  That requires learning the form well, which requires brain matter, which is currently being overused.  So, TKD is mainly exercise for me right now.  But I have a whole year to accomplish that goal.

I wouldn't mind going hang gliding again during my year of jubilee.  Or even up in a hot air balloon.

There are family members I would like to visit.  There are friends I would like to visit.  There are places I would like to visit.

I am would like to finish this journey of my studies well, realizing that I have to balance my time with studies and other roles of life (parent, wife, daughter, friend, etc.).

It is a desire to get out and hike at least once a week, but sometimes that doesn't happen.  I do try to walk at least 4-5 times a week.

I plan to have some time apart, whether it is a 5 day Academy or SOULfeast so that my soul has time to catch up with my body.  Though that is a significant time set apart, I also plan to set aside smaller sabbath rest times throughout the year to "be", to rest, to play, to relax, etc.

I am hoping that my year of jubilee lives into itself historically and that all my debts are forgiven!  So, for the remainder of my seminary courses.... FREE!  For the remainder of the mortgage..... FREE!  YIPPEE!!  That sure would be super!  But, I'm not so sure that others will want to celebrate my year of jubilee in that manner.

Ultimately, how do I want to celebrate my year of jubilee?  Here's how I want to live it out:  I want to love God, with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength. I want to love others. I want to love myself.  I want to walk humbly.  I want to act justly.  I want to seek mercy.   If any of those things sound familiar to you, then you might be thinking of these verses:

Matthew 22:37-39 (NIV)

‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ ³⁸ This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 

Micah 6:8 (NIV)

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.
    And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
    and to walk humbly with your God.

I don't know what all this year of jubilee has in store for me, but I do know that I'm excited to live into it.  I have been looking forward to living into the 2nd half of life for several years now.  I've probably really already been living into it in many ways.  The number is finally catching up to me.

Thank you to all who have been celebrating with me.  Know that I'm celebrating this year of jubilee all year long, so if you want to have coffee, go on a hike, share a meal, catch a play or movie, just chat... whatever, let me know.

How goes it on your journey?  What are you celebrating?  With whom are you celebrating?

Blessings on your journey!

Debra


PS-- One of the cool things for me during our time in KY was playing my flute underneath the Natural Arch.  I am still learning to play.  I just play/pray the flute.  That was a very sacred and special time for me to play the flute.  I probably should have taken advantage of having someone with me to take the video, but alas, there is a headless flute player.  The acoustics were incredible there.  Don't blame the acoustics for any poor sound quality.... that would be the flute player. ☺

Pushing 5...reflections of an example of living well from Will

5/25/13 at Vandergriff Park.  Fun afternoon.

This phrase, "pushing 5", has been in my mind since Will's celebration on April 12, 2014.  Reverend Reed Shell used it as he was talking about Will's life and it struck a chord within me.  Here was Will, not yet 5 years old, yet he had impacted the Kingdom of God in mighty ways more than many adults might in a life time.  What was the difference that could explain such an impact?  Reverend Reed Shell spoke of the difference.  It was Will's uninhibited passion and boldness.  Will didn't meet a stranger.  Will offered love and grace to everyone he met. 

I'm sure Will had his moments.  He was a child.  He went through the 2s and 3s.  I imagine his Mom and Dad could share a few temper tantrum stories.  But, that isn't what we remember.  I am thankful, too, that my Father doesn't focus on those in my life. 

What Will led by example in life, he leaves behind in his passing as a beautiful legacy and example for all of us. 

What does it take to engage a person in line in dialogue?  What does it take to smile at someone?  What does it take to tell someone "I love you."?  For Will, it didn't "take" anything.  It was part of his natural giving.  There are stories of Will engaging others in dialogue and by the time the conversation is over, he is telling the person that he loves them.  There are other stories of Will making sure a kid is properly buckled in his car seat and inquiring as to whether or not that kid has been baptized.  Will's words, his smiles, his hugs.... INFECTIOUS!

It does seem easier, though, doesn't it?  For a young child, "pushing 5",  society hasn't yet stifled the passion and boldness.  To see a child reaching out with such love and enthusiasm is endearing, but we don't necessarily see ourselves being able to do the same thing.  But, why not?  Aren't we called by Christ to 'become like children'?  This doesn't mean be childish, but rather childlike.  (See Matthew 18:3.) 

Even when we are called to live into our created beings, it is still difficult.  To be bold in love and grace isn't always accepted when we are older.   Thankfully, Christ has called us to not follow the ways of the world.  If we are going to take these steps, we need to realize that it means risking vulnerability, humility, and remembering who and Whose we are.  But these things are such that take us right back to our Creator, so maybe it's worth it.

If that wasn't enough, during Will's celebration of life, Reverend Reed Shell encouraged us to be more like Will.  Maybe that's why the phrase "pushing 5" caught my attention so much.  You see, Will was pushing 5.  I am pushing 50.  It is truly my desire to live life with abandon, to love others, to offer grace freely and abundantly.  Yet, I sometimes hold back.  (That might surprise some folks.)  But, I felt the freedom through Reverend Reed Shell and his sharing about Will to live into my year of Jubilee, my 50th year, with that freedom. 

I guess that might be a warning.  I'm not sure.  For me, it will continue to be part of the adventurous journey.

What are you "pushing"?  Whatever the number, don't let it stop you from being intentional, passionate, and bold in sharing love and grace with others.

It's part of living well.  And, it's a wonderful legacy.  Just look at Will.

Thank you Will for sharing your life with SO many in the time you were here on this earth.  I am grateful for times together at birthday parties, Starbucks, the park, and the time I was with you in  the PICU.  

Living into the freedom as a child of God on this journey,

Debra

P.S.  For more "Will stories", check out his Dad's (Tony Smith) blog, "When There is a Will, There is a Way"

Persevering to the end..... my first 5K experience

This past Saturday, I did my first 5K.  I say "did" because I didn't run the entire time.  I started off running.  I ran off and on in the middle.  I finished running.  Okay, jogging.  I walked at other times.  Walking and running (jogging) was my intention.  Finishing was my intention.  I didn't really have a time to finish under in mind, other than I really wanted to finish in under an hour.  Well, truth be told, a friend did her first 5K a few months back and did around 45 minutes, so that was in the back of my mind. ☺

I started walking October 1st of 2013.  Back then, a 5K wasn't in my vision as a goal.  But, fairly soon, it became a goal.

When I learned about the Operation Outreach 5K that was helping out the Soddy Daisy Food Bank, I checked my calendar and found out I would be in town.  I check with the race organizers to see if walkers were allowed for the 5K and it was all good.  So, Operation Outreach became my first 5K race goal.  I used Runkeeper to count down days to the race, March 29.

On March 29, race day, it was raining slightly (drizzling) when I headed over to the starting point at Mile Straight Baptist Church.  Though I didn't know it until race time, they had decided to alter the route due to the weather.  That wasn't a big deal really, except that I later learned a friend had come out to support me and had place herself along the original route.  OOPS.  What dedication to come out on an early Saturday morning in rainy weather.  And, then to have the route changed.  I remain grateful for the effort and show of support!

I'm still sore from Saturday.... shins, quads, hams... but the soreness will work itself out eventually.  I haven't run that much in decades.  I ran track my senior year in high school (and enjoyed it), but I was primarily a swimmer throughout my life.  I marched in the band.  I rode bicycles.  I hiked (and still do).  And these days I walk 5-6 days a week. 

Even with all the walking since October.... and increased walking and hiking in March (over 50 miles and 25 hours), I still found myself worn out at the end of the race and coming close to vomiting at the very end.... the feeling where you've given it all you can give it and your lungs are coming up your throat.  But, thankfully, my lungs and my stomach stayed in place and I didn't puke, upchuck or vomit at the end of my first 5K.

Results from the race?

There were 89 people in the race.  I came in 78th overall (I was #1886).  My time was 47:21.  My pace was 15:16. 

In my age category (40-49), there were 17.  I came in 14th.  I was the oldest in my age category! ☺

These are decent statistics, especially for my very first 5K.  But it wasn't about these numbers.  The best statistics are the numbers that reveal how much food was donated to the Soddy Daisy Food Bank: 2,491 pounds of food!  Now, that's what makes this a successful 5K in my opinion!  It was the first "Operation Outreach 5K" and that's a great start to a yearly race!

The Soddy Daisy Food Bank is an organization we have helped out as a family through different churches and through BI-LO, a local grocery food store.   It was good to catch up with several of the volunteers with that organization that I know from days gone by.

Walking and doing a 5K are part of my preparation for my year of jubilee that begins in October.  I don't know when my next 5K will be or what it's mission focus will be.  But I don't think this past Saturday was my 'first and last' 5K.  I look forward to more adventures on the road.

Speaking of adventures, I am enjoying this pre-jubilee year.   If my pre-jubilee year at 49 is so wonderfully freeing, adventurous, and growth-producing, I simply can't imagine what the year of jubilee is going to be. 

Blessings on your adventures and your journey,

Debra

Planning and living into my Year of Jubilee

50.  The Year of Jubilee.

I'm not really sure what I've thought about the big "50" until now.  What do I think about it?  I'm excited.  Though I've not thought a whole lot about it, I started thinking about it as my 49th approached.  I had planned to go hang gliding for my 50th birthday (since it didn't work out earlier in life).  Yet, as my 49th approached, I felt the urge to simply go ahead and do it.  And, I'm so glad I did!  If you haven't figured that out from the three blog postings I put up on my experience. ☺

I had one friend ask -- 'now what?'  Now that I have flown to great heights, what will I do for the 50th?  Great question.

At the very end of October, I collected on my free Starbucks coffee drink.  I didn't go skimpy.  Would you?  I had these thoughts that days: "Thanks Starbucks! Happy free birth drink to me! Love that perk on the rewards card! Alas, today ends the celebration month. But... The year of 49 will continue on with many more adventures! Gearing up for 50 and beyond!!"

I had an Academy friend respond to that, saying: "Time to plan your jubilee."  This put the idea of "Year of Jubilee" in my mind.  It resonated with me and I have been contemplating that.

I found an article in Focus on the Family by Penny Musco of one woman's experience. 

I don't know about a party yet, that's a long way off.  What I may do is implement what a fellow board member did for her 60th this year.  She planned several gatherings and outings and invited folks to join her.  That's a cool idea.  Folks went to the functions they could, they were able to celebrate and fellowship in a variety of settings.  This idea resonates with me more than a party.  I can see activities from dinners to opportunities to serve to maybe a concert (depends on who's in town or close enough) to a road trip to hiking to pottery shopping to.... who really knows?!?!

I have time to think about that. ☺

But it's not just the celebration of turning 50.  I do want to contemplate all that has brought me to this point.  And though it doesn't sting as bad as it used to, there was a time in my life that I honestly didn't think I'd live beyond 33 years old.  That's because one of my dear family members died at that young age and for some reason, it imbedded deep within my psyche and soul that I might not live beyond that age either. 

In these 49 years I have experienced more, traveled more, learned more, done more, dealt with more, seen more, been blessed with more.... than I could ever have imagined.  Maybe I will attempt to create a list at some point..... of all the blessings, all the relationships, all the places, all the experiences.... WHEW! 

I have had my share of difficult and horrific situations in my life.  But there has been TONS of grace and forgiveness extended to me along the way.  I consider all those situations a blessing to be part of who I am today.  Yeah, I know... there's not a whole lot of detail there.  But if you want to know, I'll share.  There are stories about catching a brother on fire, breaking a collarbone, burning a friend's leg on a motorcycle ride, wrecking with my Dad on a motorcycle in a graveyard, marriage, divorce, pregnancy, etc. 

What do I look forward to most in planning my jubilee?  The intentional focus on my relationship with God and others over the past and into the future.

I am free and desire to continue living this life reckless, with abandon. 

What does this mean for my celebration of the year of jubilee?  I don't know.  I hope it means that I continue to love well, to live well, to seek forgiveness when I don't.  I hope that I'm able to risk vulnerability and be transparent enough to show the love and light of the One who created me and has sustained me to this point.

There might be more hang gliding. 

There might even be a 1/2 marathon..... where I walk, not run.  I'm not sure my restored ACL and exercise-induced asthma could handle me running.  However, I won't rule it out.

There will likely be at least one testing for a higher rank in taekwondo... at some point.

I imagine there will be continued learning and growing, beyond my comfort zone.  And, that's good.

My plan is to live the 49th and 50th fully!  Living fully won't mean being on the go all the time either.  There will be times of quiet, silence, solitude.... In fact, it might be time to go on a silent retreat for more than a 1/2 day.  ☺  Or, at least take off to the beach or a cabin somewhere! ☺

Whether my themes will follow the Biblical ones in the article that Cindy followed (release, redemption, restoration) or whether God puts some other themes on me is yet to be seen.  I will take time to contemplate what this special time can mean for me.

Whether you've already celebrated your "Year of Jubilee" or are nowhere near it, it doesn't hurt to think about your life in terms of living into each and every year that you have to celebrate.  

Is there anything specific you hope to learn, experience, share, etc. no matter which number happens to be on this particular year?

Blessings on your journey!

Debra

P.S. As for a cake.... what would it be if I submitted to some sort of celebration?  It would need to be a combination of at least the following three:  motorcycle, hiking, taekwondo.  That would be one wild cake!