Spiritual Direction-- a balm for my soul

I met with my spiritual director this morning for our monthly time. After our session, I took a moment to check out her beautiful garden and get some photos. I took a handful of photos and didn't stay long, but the incredible beauty could have kept me there much longer. There is such a diverse variety of plants and flowers. It is a gorgeous space! St. Francis thinks so too, as he was there in statue form.

As I drove away, I noted the peacefulness and calm in my heart, mind, body, and soul. I gave thanks for this gift of spiritual direction as I reflected on today and the years I have been in direction.

I believe I started in spiritual direction in 2009. I thought I had a blogpost about the beginnings of this journey, but I don't. I started blogging in September 2010, so that's why I don't find a blog about the beginning of my spiritual direction journey. I do have about 5 posts in which I have mentioned "spiritual director" and/or talked some about my experience.

*Growing in silence...sharing the sacred space--May 12, 2013
*Hello.... I'm a Seminarian--September 20, 2013
*A Rainy Friday Full of Unexpected Adventures-- January 23, 2015
*Down By the Water-- September 9, 2016
*Sacred Spaces for Quiet and Listening--December 26, 2016

I wrote a paragraph or so about my time with my spiritual director in the above posts. Truthfully, I would have thought that a spiritual practice I have been engaging in monthly would have had more written about it than I have done. 

One thing that is evident from the above writings is that this spiritual practice of spiritual direction brings me peace. I'm glad it's a practice that I began and that I've continued.

I know I've written about it in my journal. I found my journals from 2011 to present and yes, I have written some about spiritual direction. However, I don't find anything taking me back to the beginnings of the journey.

How and when did I begin spiritual direction? I think it goes back to one of the SoulFeast experiences at Lake Junaluska (though I didn't attend one of those until summer 2010). Does it go back to the 5 Day Academy that I attended in the Fall of 2010? I was on the board for about 6 years with Fellowship of United Methodist Spiritual Directors and Retreat Leaders (FUMSDRL) also known as Hearts on Fire (HOF). It could have started in those days. I thought maybe I began in 2009 or 2010, but I can't find proof.  Maybe I started in 2011 when I started back to seminary for the M.Div. in 2011?! No, I am fairly sure I was already in direction by then. Now, where are my spiritual timelines that I had to write in the early days of seminary?!?! Those might help me. I'm not sure what about the year is important to me, but for now, it is something for me to let go. That's the "when" (or lack of "when").

Here's the "how":

I remember searching the directory on the Spiritual Directors International website. I found 3 directors locally at that time. As I prayed, I felt led to one more than the others. She was a retired professor, had taught at UTC, and became an Episcopal priest as a second calling. Our first meeting was held at the Barnes & Noble cafe at Hamilton Place. The connection was good and I have been seeing her monthly ever since (except for during the pandemic). 

Today's time in spiritual direction contained more silence and pauses on my part. I noted the ongoing liminal space(s) in my life and a sense of not being tethered (or rather a sense of being untethered). Other words that came out were "unknowing", "trusting", "peace". I have experienced quite a bit of liminal space and unknowing over the years. I think that is how I have come to live in it with more peace. It has helped me become more present in the present moment and to trust what is to be. 

Here are some photos from the garden/front yard after my spiritual direction time.

Peace in the ongoing liminal space and transitions, 

Deb

Nature time heals!

If you follow my blog, you might notice the theme of nature in my writings. I have always been drawn to nature, creation. Yet it is in recent years that I've come to realize that nature heals, that nature is part of my self-care/soul-care, and that spending time in nature is a spiritual practice. Who knew that something so simple, spending time outdoors in creation, could offer so much?!?!

Yesterday as I was riding my bike through the Chickamauga Battlefield and enjoying the canopy of the trees and the wildflowers, it came to me how much nature time truly heals, offers me self-care/soul-care, and is one of my spiritual practices.

It isn't that I didn't know that before. I did. During the height of the pandemic, I spent as much time as possible outside, in nature. Sometimes that meant being in my backyard. I spent time in the hammock or looked for mushrooms or checked out what happened to be budding or blooming at the time,  or I would be on the patio or deck. It's a practice I had prior to pandemic and one I have continued since the worst of pandemic ended. Sometimes I find cool things blooming in the front yard too, but the back yard is my go-to, with all the trees.

Worship in an outdoor space monthly also feeds my soul. I am able to do that through Bamboo Encounter, which is part of Wild Church Network.

On my walks and hikes (and even my bike rides), I am on the look out for interesting things in nature.

This past Monday I went to a new-to-me place to walk. I found a tiny turtle, a robin's egg, some very cool trees, a pond, tiny creeks, etc. It was a wonderful place and I plan to go back.

My nature/outdoor shelf of books continues to expand slowly. Two books that relate to this post are Steven Chase's book Nature as Spiritual Practice and Rochelle Calvert's Healing with Nature.

Though there are many nuggets to quote from both the above books, here is one quote apiece:

"Spiritual practice in nature changes and transforms the mind and body and soul." (Chase, xx)

"Nature has an intrinsic tendency to thrive, and it always works with and toward a traumatic or difficult experience to find a new way of being and restore health. We can see this in the way a tree grows back after a limb is torn off by the wind, or a tiny patch of grass grows up through a crack in concrete. In nature, healing is supported by interconnection." (Calvert, 3-4)

Some past posts on nature and/or creation: (for others, you can search "nature" or "creation" on my page)

*Nature Deficit Disorder-- January 13, 2015
*Trail's Inn Campground-- September 28, 2010
*Advice From a River--July 29, 2011
*Restlessness Gives Way to Peace as I Abide-- January 4, 2013
*Lessons from Creation...the Creator Speaks--April 8, 2014
*Bamboo Encounter-- A Nudge is Becoming a Reality-- February 7, 2019

There are MANY more posts on nature, creation, being outdoors. I didn't realize how many until I just looked. It is obvious that nature is a big part of who I am.

Peace on this adventurous journey!

Rev. Deb

Selected photos from Monday's walk at Rocky Face Ridge Park:

Selected photos from Tuesday's bike ride at the Chickamauga Battlefield:

Labyrinth time during Holy Week

Though my Lenten practice of walking/praying the labyrinth is over, I wanted to walk/pray during Holy Week. 

I was able to get my time in at dusk.

As I approached the labyrinth at Burks UMC,  I saw something brown in the grass. Was it a squirrel? It turned out to be a bunny rabbit. There were two. The one in the left hopped away sooner than the one on the right. 

Bunnies and blooms were the overall theme tonight, along with crickets as the primary sound.

The violets were in full bloom. There were a few dandelions in white form, or as I call them, blowy flowers. 

My heart seemed heavier tonight. I sat vigil this afternoon with someone who will soon be crossing the threshold.  Yet, that is not a heavy thing. It is a beautiful experience, Holy ground, and an honor to walk that part of life with someone. 

Truthfully, it is a beautiful experience, Holy ground, and an honor to walk any and all parts of life with someone.  That is something I enjoy offering to another. It is part of who I am. Me, as me. Me, as pastor. Me, as ally. Etc. It is simply me. I have always walked alongside others, meeting them where they are.

Maybe that's what keeps drawing me back to the labyrinth. It takes me to the center of things, to the center of who I am. It allows me to let go, to trust the One who created me, and to help me to be me.

As this week continues, may I walk/pray knowing I am a beloved child of God. May I live into the me I am created to be. 

May you know this too. May you do this too.

Peace, 

Rev. Deb