Day 2 of the 5 Day Academy-- "God's Life" Wasting time with God and God IS everywhere

Today is Day 2 of the 5 Day Academy at Trinity Center, yet the 1st full day of the rhythms, as yesterday was travel/arrival day.  After 12 hours of traveling (9 hours and 34 minutes of driving PLUS stops for coffee, gas, and a seafood lunch on Emerald Isle = 12 hours total), I got checked in and settled in and then hit the beach before evening activities.  Oh, what a joy to get to walk down those steps, walk on the beach, and get in the water! The last time I was here for a Hearts on Fire retreat in the summer of 2018 I didn't get to do that because it was right after my left hip surgery. 

My first 5 Day Academy was in 2010 at Camp Garner Creek in TN.  That was life-changing for me in so many ways-- the people I met and the connections and relationships, not to mention all the God-talk and introduction to the bilingual 2 Year Academy. Link for Academy for Spiritual Formation.

My 2 Year Academy was 2011-2013.  One of the faculty presenters in that journey was Jerry Webber. He is a presenter this week.

In thinking about Christian mindfulness and Scriptures that mention God creating, one of the things on my mind in my afternoon silence and reflection time was the thought that 'God IS everywhere'.  Jerry Webber had mentioned that in his session and had also mentioned statements that we tend to say such as 'God showed up'.  Think on that one for a moment.  We do say it, don't we!?!  Now, REALLY think about it.  God was, is, and always will be.  So, how is it that God showed up?!?! What truly and really happened is that we were made aware.  We saw. We heard. We paid attention. 

As I thought through this, part of my reflection was that I feel/sense God most near water or in the woods, etc. Being in creation is a big part of my spiritual connection with God and spiritual practices.  It isn't that God isn't elsewhere.  So, what IS it?

It is that I can slow down, I can become aware, I can watch/see, I can listen. I am more attentive.

I am awake to the Divine Presence around me and inside me.

Walking on the beach I found some heart-shaped shells.  I saw a heart-shaped leaf later in the day.  Hearts remind me of God's love. #seeaheartshareaheart

One person shared tootsie pops with us after asking the age-old question: 'how many licks does it take...?'  That made my day.  I have written about tootsie pops and this question before. In fact, I think it came up once at my 2 Year Academy.  Amy Oden, our morning presenter said, "Tootsie Pops as a spiritual practice" after the gentleman shared his reflection with us. That made me smile so big!

PREVIOUS TOOTSIE POP POSTS:

"How many times does it take to get it right?  The center of the message is love." July 16, 2011
Unraveling... September 20 2011
"How much silence does it take?" August 4, 2014

I wrote three Haikus this morning in the morning silence reflection time.

Breath across water
causing gentle, rolling waves
Breathe in me, God's breath

wasting time with God

a favorite thing to do

brings rest to my soul

Jesus said, 'Come! See!'

reflection on the water

peace and rest for soul

I saw a tiny crab this morning and several this afternoon.

This set-apart time is a gift. It is a gift to see God everywhere, to waste time with God, to come and see, to listen, to engage in holy conversation, etc.

Though I don't know where the adventure leads, it is good to be on the journey.

I will close with a Gaelic blessing, of which the first line is found on a plaque at the beach here: 

Deep peace of the running wave to you.
Deep peace of the flowing air to you.
Deep peace of the quiet earth to you.
Deep peace of the shining stars to you.
Deep peace of the gentle night to you.
Moon and star pour their healing light on you.
Deep peace of Christ, 
of Christ the light of the world to you.
Deep peace of Christ to you.

Rev. Deb

[All photos are mine.]

How Much Silence Does It Take?

 Psalm 62:1 For God alone my soul waits in silence;

                                                 from him comes my salvation. (NRSV)

Do you remember the jump rope songs from elementary school?  The ones where you say a little "ditty" and then start counting as you jump the rope.  When the rope hits you, you start over again.

Here is one:  "Cinderella Dressed in Yella/Yellow"

Cinderella Dressed in Yella

Cinderella dressed in yella,
Went downstairs to kiss a fella,
Made a mistake and kissed a snake.
How many doctors did it take
1, 2, 3, . . . .

Cinderella dressed in yellow
Went downstairs to kiss her fellow.
How many kisses did she give?
One, two, three, four, five . . .
~Adele Greil

Lately, that's how I'm feeling about my spiritual practice of silence.  I'm jumping rope and repeating my rhyme.  I get to the part, "how much silence does it take?" and start the counting.  1... 2... 3... WHAM.  I miss a beat and the jump rope tumbles around my ankles.  I have to start again.

If the jump rope analogy doesn't work for you, how about the owl?  You know, the one in the Tootsie Roll lollipop commercial... hear the wise owl ask: "How much silence does it take to get to the center of your soul?"  One, two, three, CRUNCH!  Oops.  Busted, again.

Maybe you can't relate to my odd analogies.  You bask in silence so much that you are always even keel, at peace, calm, etc.  Great!  Share your secret! 

Here is my story.

I am learning that it takes more and more silence for me to exist in a wholehearted and healthy place than it did once before.  Or, maybe it did then, but I am recognizing it more and more.  Yet, it does feel that my need for silence is growing, the more I get.

Part of the situation is that I was super blessed to be in that two week protective "bubble" of retreats with SOULfeast in NC and the FUMSDRL time in MN back to back.  I had quite a bit of silent time in both places and my soul was full, to overflowing. 

Coming back home, I created space for silence by attending the Centering Prayer group one day, by walking the Labyrinth at church, by spending time at my firepit, by taking some walks by myself, and by taking "pause" breaks throughout the day.  Ahhh...  yes, for those moments.  But, they didn't seem to fill my tank to where it was with those two weeks back to back. 

I began to wonder if possibly my need for silence on my journey is growing.  This silence journey has been an ongoing one for quite a few years now.  Oh, going back at least 7 years when the Scripture "Be still and know" first grabbed hold of me and started planted itself deep within my soul.  I have been learning, slowly yet surely, how to live into that. 

In spite of the growth on the journey, the skills and practices learned, and even the time taken for the silence and stillness, I am finding that I tend to want more of it. 

It is almost as if the more silence I experience, the more I desire.  Truly, I often hunger and thirst for it, crave it. 

Though I still enjoy listening to the radio in the car, I find I turn it off more frequently.

It may very well be that my tank stayed so full those two weeks because there wasn't much to drain it, but there was constant filling.  Compare that to the normal (and not so normal) expectations of daily life that do and will drain the tank. 

It may be that the tank simply drained more quickly than it was being filled.  So, even though I was doing the right thing by "being", it simply couldn't handle the drain.

When one hits the wall of the drain being more than the filling, one quietly takes a time out and goes to fill up, right?!?!  That would be beautiful.  And, I hope to accomplish that more often.  There are times when I catch myself and can do that.  There are times I can recognize the symptoms and know that if I don't plunge myself into silence and solitude, then it is going to get ugly. 

However, there are other times that the warning signs don't seem to work, and I combust.  Like this time.  Last night.  I allowed the ugly dark side to flow through strongly and take over.  Even though it was slightly provoked, I still had a choice in my reaction.  Thankfully, there was still room for forgiveness and grace for both of us.

Regardless, the incident made me reflect about my practice of silence and solitude... and how much does it take to keep my soul whole and healthy.  It was a good warning sign for me to check my tank more often for leaks and to be aware of what does drain my tank.

How about your times of silence?  Are they sufficient to allow you to listen to the One Voice, to clear away the noise and clutter, and to simply "be"?

Now, for my afternoon "pause"........

Blessings on your journey,

Debra

P.S.  I decided to do a search on "how much silence is necessary for your soul?", but couldn't find a hard and fast rule of thumb.  I imagine it is one of those things that is unique to each one of us and will also be determined by life's situations surrounding us (meaning whether or not there is a leak in our tank).  I did find some interesting articles and a helpful website.  I am posting only four of them here.  There is much more available out there in cyberspace and in books.  It's a topic I've covered before too, so you could search within my own postings on "silence" ☺.   It is a topic I will write about again too because living into the practice of silence is an ongoing learning and growth journey.

Why We Need Silence to Survive by George Michelsen Foy
The Power of Being Still (and Silent) before God by Peter Scazzero
About Silence, An Invitation to Silence, Practicing Silence, A Story of Silence
Finding God in the Depths of Silence by Richard Rohr

Unraveling...

Have you ever had a thread on an article of clothing start to unravel?  The temptation is to pull it, thinking that if you break it off it will stop unraveling.  However, that doesn't really stop it, now does it? 

My bookmark in my Jesus Calling devotional is unraveling.  The thread is so thin that I really cannot tie a knot in it.  I guess I need to find a sharp pair of scissors and cut it off above the unraveling section.

What about life?  Does it ever seem to unravel?  It does for me.  Just this morning I had a moment.  One of those moments that was about to send me into a tail-spin.  You know... when you think you've got everything in order (all your ducks in a row, so to speak), but something plants a doubt in your mind and you start to wonder. 

Well, for me, it was about whether or not I was reading the correct set of books for the upcoming October session for the 2 Year Academy.  I thought I had all the right books (though I had forgotten if "white" or "purple" was required).  [It is purple!] Yet, on the faculty member's bio, there were two other books listed that weren't under the required readings.  Instead of going into major panic mode, I first sent an e-mail out to my covenant group asking for verification.  Whew!  Those two books aren't required, I'm heading in the right direction.

Now, what if they were required?  Would that have thrown me into a tail-spin?  Or would I have been able to "Be still, and know..."?  As the owl from the tootsie roll pop commercials might say, "one will never know."   ☺ (I think he actually said, "the world will never know.") 

Seriously, I think I would have buckled down, gotten the books and started reading.  I'm a bibliophile.  Being told I have more books to read isn't a bad thing, except for when time isn't as available as one would like.  And, that's where I'd have to make some adjustments.  Something else would have to give.  What would it be? 

Just the fact that this caused my heart to beat a little faster tells me something.  It tells me a few things.  I need to read more efficiently. ☺  I've got a few books left to go for October.   It also tells me that my river of peace isn't flowing as deeply as I would like it to be these days. 

There are a few things calling for my attention these days: Greek, mentored ministry, missions, mothering, wife, doctor appointments, exercise, etc.  I'm doing a decent job of balancing.  I've even been getting some good sleep in the past couple of nights!! 

But, I desire the deep flow of the river so that no matter what, the peace is flowing.  And, that requires spending some good 'ole silence and solitude time.  Oops.  Aha!  Guess what is missing.  Well, it's not missing.  It just isn't as lengthy as I want/need it to be.  Instead of drinking deeply from the well of silence and solitude, I've been grabbing fountain sips.  They help me keep going, but they don't quench the deep thirst.

A couple of thoughts from Sarah Young's Jesus Calling before I close today:

"Seek to please Me above all else.  Let that be your focal point as you go through this day.  Such a mind-set will protect you from scattering your energy to the winds." (September 18, p. 273)

"Try to see things more and more from My perspective.  Let the Light of My Presence so fully fill your mind that you view the world through Me." (September 20, p. 275)

As I seek to please God above all else and see things from God's perspective, I imagine the feeling of "unraveling" will dissolve back into peace.  Imagine that! 

Thanks for allowing me to share how my life can sometimes quickly start to unravel (when I get my focus and perspective "out of whack"). 

I hope and pray that we take time to be still and seek God's presence and perspective along the journey today!  I know that I'm about to do just that right now.

Blesssings on your journey! 

~Debra

How many times does it take to get it right? The center of the message is love.

Some of you might remember the Tootsie Roll Lollipop commercials with the boy asking the owl 'how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop? And the owl takes the lollipop and answers, 'ONE, TWO, THREE, CRUNCH...' as he takes a bite....

As I reflect on my hectic day, I wonder 'how many times does it take to get it right?' ONE, TWO, THREE, keep going.... no "crunch" yet.   No matter how much I grow in my faith, spiritual maturity, or emotional maturity, there is ALWAYS a need for more growth!!  So, I've learned that the journey is ongoing.  And, I've learned to live into the journey: the questions, the ups and downs, the roller coasters, the frustration, the pain, the joy, etc. 

When I fall or fail, I get up again.  How can I keep getting up?  My eyes are on the One from whom I receive my strength, my hope, my meaning, my significance, my security.  (Though I don't always live like I believe it.)

Toby Mac has a song, "Get Back Up".  Check out the lyrics and listen here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Q_-9FyIxQE

"Get Back Up"

You turned away when I looked you in the eye,
And hesitated when I asked if you were alright,
Seems like you're fighting for your life,
But why? oh why?
Wide awake in the middle of your nightmare,
You saw it comin' but it hit you outta no where,
And there's always scars
When you fall that far

We lose our way,
We get back up again
It's never too late to get back up again,
One day you gonna shine again,
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever,
Lose our way,
We get back up again,
So get up, get up,
You gonna shine again,
Never too late to get back up again,
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever
[May be knocked down but not out forever]

You rolled out at the dawning of the day
Heart racin' as you made you little get away,
It feels like you've been runnin' all your life
But, why? Oh why?

So you've pulled away from the love that wou'd've been there,
You start believin' that your situation's unfair

But there's always scars,
When you fall that far

We lose our way,
We get back up again
Never too late to get back up again,
One day, you gonna shine again,
You may be knocked down but not out forever,
Lose our way, we get back up again,
So get up, get up
You gonna shine again
It's never too late, to get back up again
You may be knocked down, but not out forever,
May be knocked down, but not out forever!

This is love callin', love callin', out to the broken,
This is love callin'.
This is love callin', love callin', out to the broken
This is love callin'.
This is love callin', love callin',
I am so broken
This is love callin' love callin

Lose our way, [way way way ay ay ay]
We get back up, [get back up again]
It's never too late [late late late ate ate ate]
You may be knocked down but not out forever!

Lose our way,
We get back up again,
So get up get up
You gonna shine again
Never too late to get back up again
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever,

This is love [lose our way] callin' love callin' [get back up again]
To the broken
This is love [never too late] callin'
[may be knocked down but not out forever]
This is love [lose our way] callin' love callin' [we get back up again]
To the broken
This is love [never too late] callin'
[may be knocked down but not out forever]

This is love callin' love callin'
Out to the broken,
This is love callin'....

No matter how many times you've fallen or feel like you've failed or fallen short, remember to turn your eyes upon the One who created you, who loves you more than anyone else, and get back up.  It IS love calling out to the broken.  And, as we continue to answer the call of love to us, we are better equipped to share love with others who are broken as well.

How many times will it take for me to grasp that the center of the message of Christ is love?  If only I could've been like that owl, 'ONE, TWO, THREE...'

May you know that love is calling you and may you answer that call. 

Have a Tootsie Roll Lollipop somewhere along your journey,

~Debra